I've probably had thousands of 1:1s in my career so far. For most people who reported to me, the conversations have been going smoothly and have been open. This open and honest dialogue has been instrumental in all of my team's successes. However, sometimes, it is hard to get genuine and thoughtful answers to critical questions.
For example, here is a list of questions I used to ask in my 1:1s:
- "What can I do for you to help?" or
- "What problems are you seeing with the current team?" or
- "Do you have any feedback for me?"
With my One Thing principle, I slightly rephrase my questions as follows:
- "What is one thing I can do for you to help?" or
- "What is one problem you are seeing with the team?" or
- "What is one piece of feedback you have for me?"
The subtle change makes a major difference.
It shifts the direct report (or whomever you are interacting with) to think about giving you one answer.
That doesn't work all the time, though.
Sometimes, someone does not have an answer or does not want to share it at the time.
And that's okay.
But open questions will give you open answers. And open answers are rarely helpful.